Posts tagged other words

The Wooster Named Nick

         If you look back to the root of advertising, you may just find profitability. But for a brand, and especially in recent decades, it is a bit different. For me, a good brand has a permanent space in their customer’s brains, where distinct intuition and trust reside. With a great brand, customers act on that space, becoming advocates in their daily lives. The even greater brands do this, seemingly, without trying.

         You probably haven’t heard of Nick Wooster from the TV, or tabloids, or anything offline — but he’s a pretty big deal. He’s an Internet superstar, a Tumblr fashion God, and for many people, the Nick Wooster brand came before they even heard of the name Nick Wooster.

         
I stress that I don’t intend to discredit any of what Mr. Wooster has accomplished. Simply put, he is a fashion icon. He’s built an enviable career as a style aficionado, with spells at such luxury brands as Calvin Klein, Ralph Lauren, and John Bartlett. He also served as Men’s Fashion Director for Neiman Marcus and Bergdorf Goodman. In 2005, he founded the revered Wooster Consultancy and has since built an impressive clientele, while being featured in such publications as GQ, Esquire, Karmaloop, and countless influential fashion blogs.

         Still, I had to research to become this acquainted with Nick. And by research, I mean delving into the 2nd page of a Google search, which, let’s be honest, is a lot more than can be expected from the type of thirteen to twenty-something year old fan base that has propelled Nick Wooster’s hand prints onto the online Grauman’s Chinese Theatre’s sidewalk. Because plopped above all the professional accomplishments Mr. Wooster has compiled, are another hundred Tumblr followers, another thousand reblogs, and nearly endless amounts of clicks.

         Call me shallow, but I admire Nick for this. He’s built a fine résumé, much of which, was just reaffirmation of his recent online stardom. Nick needed only to get his photo shot a couple times to have his brand ascend. Even in these technologically accessible times; that’s not an easy thing to do. I think of brands like Wonder Bread, Apple, and the NYC skateboard and streetwear label Supreme, when I see what Mr. Wooster has accomplished: a genuinely original product with an exceptional feature and a clear benefit. Nick’s brand is the blending of almost intimidating masculinity, Americana, and accents of modern flair, into a refreshingly pleasing style sense, that inspires the fashion world. Also, it’s important to note that he has not yet cashed in on his originality. Nick makes lots of money for himself and for his clients, and he could certainly have his own Bravo reality TV show by now. But as soon as he starts selling himself, the brand I speak of, would take hits. But for now, I simply can’t hate on Nick Wooster’s game.

Maybe I’m just over analyzing a man who can dress. But isn’t less more?

Fake Laughs and Email Etiquette

Master these things and you can rise above average.

Don’t take them for granted like average height people sometimes do with their average height, or Norfolk/VA Beach natives with their hometown not being Newport News, or people with cool beard growing ability, or hippos — whose lifestyle requires eating and being fat.

Practice makes perfect.

Email your mom and show her you can be professional. She will be impressed and try to out-do your professionalism. Even if your mom is a FOB. Trust me. If my mom talked like she did in emails, spelling out “yes” sounding out “-ings” and using words like “indolent” and “fervently,”  I’d be creeped out and I’d slap her.

Find strangers who try hard to be funny, but aren’t, to practice your fake laughs. It shouldn’t be hard. Go to a VCU Business class, a party on Cary St., Cha Cha’s Cantina on Wednesday nights, or take a trip to Harrisonburg or Farmville.

Go forth like Levi’s.

Oscar Fashion Recap (a week later)

Here we have Natalie Portman wearing Pregnant with Baby by Benjamin Millepied.

I hate to say this, being a usual fan of hers, but this is a pretty hideous getup. Maybe it’s cause I have had a crush on her and wanted to knock her up SINCE MIDDLE SCHOOL, but who knows.

jp Natalie, Congrats. 

“natalie portman DOCKERY speech.doc”

An ode to Natalie Portman, as written in high school for Mrs. Dockery’s 11th grade AP English class.

These are screen shots of the Word document. It’s all caps and spaced out the way it is because I thought it’d be easier to cheat off of as I was doing the speech in front of class. Anchor Man was a very popular movie at the time and I don’t know if you can notice, but this speech is very Ron Burgundy inspired.

A fair amount of years later and I still pretty much feel the same about you Natalie.

I don’t think there are internships in porn.

Dear Future Employers,

I graduated recently and when we meet, I want you to have a heads up.

You’ll hear my name, Neil Lopez, and you’re gonna think nerdy Mexican.

You’re gonna think this kid is a law school hopeful currently attending the local community college while working at his parent’s Mexican restaurant making the free tortilla chips and the special white sauce and who probably has such nice copper toned skin because he edges lawns all day. 

You’ll hear Neil. You’ll think Niles or Nigel. You’ll think Christmas sweaters or cardigans with earth toned ties underneath, Dockers pants, and Clubmasters.

You’ll hear Lopez. You’ll think metallic green low riders with golden spoked rims, leaning left at the stop light to holla at your wife. You’ll think Aztec warrior, blue corn or “maiz”, two-door sedans packed with 4-5 amigos in the back, and Taco Bell.

I rub you the wrong away. You dislike me.

But wait! We start talking. I tell you I’m Filipino, meaning I’m actually Asian. I give you a brief but informative history on the raping of my ancestors by Espana — hence the last name. And then, you start to like me. You appreciate my willingness to embrace stereotypes and you grow fond of my sense of humor. You even laugh a bit. 

It’s smiles all around. Awkward smiles, but smiles nonetheless. But my smile is a fake smile, ‘cause I’m in a pretty uncomfortable position: stuck between taking those judgmental looks and those “HAHA that’s funny because it’s so true” kinda laughs to my borderline racist jokes, and wanting that 35k a year plus benefits and moving out of my parents house.

So, I try to re-break the ice. I say, “Ha ha yeah, I’m Asian. Go figure. But man guess what, I can’t even use chopsticks!”

This angers you and you dislike me all over again.

lol jk smh ttyl. Please hire me.